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Love, loss and the books between

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Victoria Sturgess from Black Pug Books lets personal grief open a wider reflection on why literature has always returned to an uneasy pairing

I thought I would interweave two seemingly contrasting emotions this month: one brought about by the heartbreaking loss of my beloved cat, Sophie, my dearest companion every day for 14 years. The other is St. Valentine’s day of love.
HE Bates – he of the life-affirming Larkin clan in the Darling Buds of May – wrote a quietly understated, bittersweet gem called A Moment in Time. It tells of a young girl falling in love with, and marrying, a fighter pilot in the second world war with the inevitable outcome. It is written in such a way as to be neither maudlin nor heroic. It will stay with you for a long time.
Perhaps the most acknowledged and influential title is CS Lewis’s A Grief Observed (written as NW Clerk to allow separation from his public persona). Just three years after their marriage, his wife Joy died from cancer. This is a poignant collection of reflections on very personal grief, the nature of love and the connection between deep love and intense sorrow.
Helen MacDonald’s H is for Hawk was acclaimed when published in 2014, and is now being released as a powerful film. It tells of her severe grief following her father’s sudden death, and her obsession with training a notoriously difficult goshawk.
The untamed nature of the bird echoes the wildness of grief – but also how it can help with human loss, and bring comfort. It is slightly reminiscent of another outstanding book, Barry Hines’ A Kestrel for a Knave, following the life of a young working-class boy, troubled at home and school, who finds and trains a kestrel. Kes was the award-winning film made from the book, and my final choice is yet another which is now a box office hit film – proving that these powerful emotions resonate far beyond the printed page.
Maggie O’Farrell’s 2020 novel Hamnet focuses on the life and tragic death of Shakespeare’s young son, though it concentrates mainly on Hamnet’s mother Agnes.
Deep love and raw grief haunt the family, and Shakespeare can only process it by turning to what he does best: write.
From the ancient Greeks to now – via Dostoevsky, Dickens, Hardy, Woolf, Ian McEwan, Julian Barnes and many others – authors have recognised the overwhelming connection between two seemingly opposite emotions. What compels authors to explore this, to try and define it … and why do we readers seem to devour it unreservedly?
Perhaps because we all understand intuitively that grief is the price we pay for love.

Castle Cary home praised for warmth, kindness and care

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A not-for-profit care home in Castle Cary is celebrating receiving ‘Good’ ratings in all areas from the Care Quality Commission (CQC).
Cary Brook provides day care, respite breaks, residential care and specialist dementia support. At its latest inspection, the CQC rated Cary Brook as Good in all five assessment areas: Safe, Effective, Caring, Responsive and Well-led.
The CQC’s report concluded that Cary Brook residents were ‘safe and well cared for’, with their privacy and dignity respected.
Relatives of those receiving care praised the ‘kindness and attentiveness’ of the Cary Brook team, who delivered person-centred care in a ‘warm and respectful’ manner.
The report commended the team for working well with other health professionals to ensure ‘continuity of care’, and noted that ‘end-of-life care was delivered with compassion’.
The CQC said that: ‘Compliments dominated the feedback we received, and people said they would recommend Cary Brook as a good place to live’

Cary Brook celebrated their CQC success with a party for residents and their loved ones
© Somerset Care Group

Outstanding at a difficult time
The positive themes noted by the CQC are reflected in independently-verified customer reviews for Cary Brook on carehome.co.uk. Feedback from residents and their loved ones celebrates the care and support provided, the clean and welcoming environment, and the warm and approachable attitude of the Cary Brook team.
‘Always happy staff and residents. My husband is so well looked after, the staff go the extra mile all the time. Home is always clean and well staffed. I cannot fault anything about this lovely home. All staff are very approachable and always happy. I am so glad this home exists.’ – wife of resident
‘The home looked after both of my parents, and the care given was second to none. End of life care for my father was dignified and professional. Acknowledgement and support towards his family were outstanding at a difficult time. I would have no hesitation in recommending Cary Brook Care Home.’ – son of resident
Lisa Warne, Cary Brook Registered Manager, explains what this feedback means to the team:
‘We are thrilled with Cary Brook’s latest CQC report. To be rated Good in all areas is a reflection of the happy place which our team have poured so much love and care into, and our wonderful residents who call Cary Brook their home.

Cary Brook provides day care, respite breaks, residential care and dementia support
© Somerset Care Group


‘It means so much more to us that the CQC’s findings reflect the individual experiences shared by our residents and their loved ones in independently-verified reviews.
‘Whether someone is visiting us for the day, staying for a short respite break or receiving longer-term residential care or dementia support at Cary Brook, our passion is to provide the best possible care within an environment where they feel welcomed, comfortable and supported. It is humbling and heartwarming to hear – from our customers and our regulator – that we are achieving this ambition.
‘Thank you to everyone who helps to make Cary Brook such a special place to work and to live.’

To enquire about Cary Brook, please visit somersetcare.co.uk/cary-brook or contact Somerset Care’s friendly and knowledgeable care advisors on 0800 8174 925.

The national briefing you didn’t hear about

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We live in a critical time when the truth has never been more urgently needed: but the media and political discourse is so peppered with lies that it’s all too easy to lose sight of the truth. Some lies are simply falsehoods, easily shown to be untrue but if repeated often enough, they can still be believed by some. Then there are those lies of omission, where important facts are withheld in order to present a false picture of a situation. This is potentially the most damaging form of lying, and where our government and media are so badly letting us down.

Ken Huggins North Dorset Green Party


There was hardly any mention in the media of an event held in Westminster on 27th November last year that was of critical importance to our country, a National Emergency Briefing (NEB) where leading experts issued stark warnings about the imminent danger the UK faces from climate and nature breakdown, and the risks we all face in terms of food security, extreme weather, health, the economy and national security. With ever-increasing weather extremes like last summer’s prolonged drought and the extensive flooding we’ve already experienced in just the first four weeks of this year, surely only the most stubbornly determined climate change deniers can continue to ignore the facts.
The aim of the NEB was direct: to present clear, expert-led facts about the climate risks facing the UK, and in so doing reset the national conversation.
The resounding message could not have been clearer: the impacts are happening now, they are accelerating, and urgent action at every level of government is essential. The presentations were honest, shocking and revealing – and only offered hope provided we act NOW with the urgency required to avoid tipping points beyond which there would be no return.
The climate and nature crisis is already impacting every part of British life and we cannot wait any longer to treat it for what it is – a genuine emergency. Everyone who cares about the future for themselves, their family, friends and communities can discover the true facts at nebriefing.org and join others in taking action.
Ken Huggins
North Dorset Green Party

Can I reduce my energy bills?

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A local expert from Citizen’s Advice provides timely tips on consumer issues.

Q: I’m spending a lot of money on energy bills. What can I do to cut down?

A : Let’s take a tour around the typical house:

The bathroom
Reduce the water temperature of your shower and keep your shower time to four minutes
Keep your bathroom ventilated – close the bathroom door and turn on your extractor fan or open a window during a shower to prevent damp and mould
Turn off the tap while brushing your teeth, shaving, or washing your face
Use cold water if you don’t need hot

The washing
Use your washing machine’s ‘eco’ cycle – this takes longer but uses less energy.
Use a heated clothes airer instead of a tumble dryer – they are cheaper to run, but dry clothes more quickly than a standard clothes airer.
Hanging your washing outside is the cheapest way to dry clothes – cold and overcast days can still be drying days. Look for breezy weather when the ground is dry.
If you are on a smart tariff, schedule appliances to run during lower price times (only run them when you are at home and awake due to potential fire risks)

The kitchen
Use the appliance that fits the meal you’re making. Air fryers, microwaves or slow cookers use less energy than an oven, and can be more economical if cooking a single meal.
Defrost frozen food in the fridge before you cook it
Cook more food at the same time – fridge leftovers to reheat another day
Put lids on pans while you’re cooking, and make sure you’re using the right size pan for the amount of food
Only add the water you need when you boil the kettle
Defrost your fridge/freezer every year and don’t hold the door open for long
The heating
Check the temperature on the thermostat: 18 to 21ºC is fine for most people
Check heating times. If you have a boiler, set the temperature 2º or 3º lower, (or programme it to be off) when you’re out or asleep. If you heat your home with another type of heating, like a heat pump, check with the installer before changing any settings
Check for numbers on thermostatic radiator valves. Set each one to the lowest number that still keeps the room comfortable. Consider installing a radiator reflector if you have radiators on external walls Close your curtains and blinds when it gets dark, as this helps keep the heat in. Keeping your curtains or blinds open when it’s light lets the sun warm the room
Exploring energy efficiency grants
Spend some time checking on help available for paying for energy efficiency home improvements

The BV community news section is sponsored by Wessex Internet

Someone draw the red line

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I’m a builder, not a scientist. I don’t spend my days arguing about carbon targets. But I do spend my days on muddy sites, looking at water where it didn’t used to sit and ground that doesn’t behave the way it did 20 years ago.
Whatever anyone thinks caused it, you’d have to be wilfully blind not to see that the climate has changed.
Which means we should be planning for the world we’re actually in now, not trying to shove the genie back in the bottle and pretend it’s 1995. That means changing how and where we build.
So here’s a simple question. During the recent floods, did any local council send a drone up, take some pictures, overlay them on a map and draw a thick red line that said “no building inside this”? Because if not, why not?

We can – but we shouldn’t
Just because we can engineer our way around flood risk doesn’t mean we should. Just because we can pile concrete into groundwater-prone slopes doesn’t mean we should. Just because we can prop up unstable land with steel, drains and clever drawings doesn’t mean we should.
And just because developers know they can drown overstretched planning departments in paperwork – thousands of pages, buried figures, selective surveys – until something important will get neatly missed, doesn’t mean we should be letting them build in places every local person knows are totally unsuitable. I’ve read about the Fingleton Review saying nature protections place ‘unnecessary costs’ on developers. From where I’m standing, that sounds like a pair of bull’s testicles. Protecting nature isn’t a luxury! It’s flood management. It’s slope stability. It’s future-proofing. And it’s cheaper than fixing failures later. Anyone who’s ever been called back to a job that’s gone wrong knows that.
What really sticks, though, is who pays when it all goes wrong? It isn’t the big developers. It’s the people buying the houses – paying top money for homes that are value-engineered, tightly packed and sold with glossy brochures … but very little margin for error.
Meanwhile, the land keeps the memory of where water wants to go, whether we like it or not.
Good building used to mean understanding the land first. Somewhere along the line, we decided clever reports and profits mattered more than common sense. I’d suggest we’ve had enough proof lately that the land still wins.

The Grumbler – the open opinion column in The BV. It’s a space for anyone to share their thoughts freely. While the editor will need to know the identity of contributors, all pieces will be published anonymously. With just a few basic guidelines to ensure legality, safety and respect, this is an open forum for honest and unfiltered views. Got something you need to get off your chest? Send it to [email protected]. The Grumbler column is here for you: go on, say it. We dare you.

The 2026 Love Local, Trust Local Awards are officially open!

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This year marks our fifth celebration of the amazing food, farming and craftsmanship that makes Dorset so special.
Dorset leads the way when it comes to outstanding food and farming … but also artisan makers. For the first time, LLTL is expanding beyond food producers to all the county’s makers, from silversmiths to soap-makers and beyond.


Enter. Nominate. Get involved. Let’s shine a spotlight on everything grown, produced, caught, reared, brewed, crafted, or cooked right here in Dorset – and yes, it’s completely FREE to enter!
Entries are already rolling in, so grab a cup of coffee and fill in your form. Stuck? Don’t worry, we’re here to help – your story deserves to be told, so get in touch! Call us on +44 78311 84920 or email us at [email protected] with any queries. We don’t want you to be Dorset’s ‘best-kept secret’. People need to know where you are and what you’re doing!
And yes, our amazing judges will visit to meet you, hear your story, and see where it all began.
This year, we’re returning to where the Love Local story started in 2018 – Rawston Farm. Awards night will be hosted in Down Barn Farm on 24th September. It’ll be an evening celebrating Dorset’s finest food, farming and talented producers, so make sure to keep the date free!

The Love Local, Trust Local Awards timeline:
Entries Opened – January 15th
Entries Close – May 31st
Judging – June/July
Awards Evening – September 24th

WINCANTON RACEDAY NEWS: ALEXEI ENTERS CHAMPION HURDLE RECKONING WITH KINGWELL SUCCESS

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Saturday 14th February

On a St Valentine’s Day card at Wincanton, it was ambition rather than romance in the air as Alexei powered his way into the Champion Hurdle picture with victory in the Grade Two BetMGM Kingwell Hurdle.

Now as short as 16-1 for next month’s Unibet Champion Hurdle at The Cheltenham Festival, the six-year-old (Joe Tizzard/Brendan Powell, 1-2 Favourite) justified market confidence with a decisive performance in the two-mile contest.

Grade 2 Winner, Alexei wins the Kingwell Hurdle @wincantonraces for Garth & Anne ridden by @brendanp1995 – courtesy of Joe Tizzard Racing

Sporting the famous silks of Garth and Anne Broom’s Brocade Racing, Alexei stalked longtime leader Rubaud before sweeping past approaching the final flight. Though hanging in the closing stages, he kept on strongly to secure a length and a quarter success.

Successful trainer Joe Tizzard said: “He was stepping up in grade and Rubaud has got a cracking record around there. The ground was also soft enough.

“He has gone and got the job done in Graded company. There are discussions to be had, but we’ll have a crack (at the Champion Hurdle).

“A bigger field with a stronger gallop suits him. He is a good traveller through a race, and the Champion Hurdle is something to aim at.

“Whether he is good enough, we’ll find out, but I think one thing he will do is travel into it and if he is good enough, he is good enough.

“It is exciting and it was a nice win today in its own right.”

Winning rider Brendan Powell added: “I went to put the race to bed between two out and the last.

“He had a bit of a look at the last, which he has done before, but he got from A to B. It gave the second horse a bit of a sniff but I was really happy with the way he picked up again, especially in that ground.

“He has come here and won a Kingwell and I’ll leave the Champion Hurdle with the boss and Garth and Anne to decide. I wouldn’t mind having a go in it anyway!”

History offers encouragement. Three winners of the Kingwell Hurdle this century – Hors La Loi III (2002), Katchit (2008) and Golden Ace (2025) – went on to land the Champion Hurdle, and connections will hope Alexei can follow in distinguished footsteps next month.

Earlier on the card, Queens Gamble (Harry Derham/Paul O’Brien, 100-30) returned to winning ways in the Listed BetMGM Agatha Christie Mares’ Novices’ Chase, rescheduled from Exeter following last Sunday’s abandonment.

The eight-year-old secured her fourth Listed success – having previously struck twice in bumpers and once over hurdles at the same level – with a determined display in the two-mile contest. She overhauled 1-3 Favourite Bluey just after the second last and stayed on strongly to win by two and a quarter lengths.

Harry Derham said: “I’m so, so pleased for her owners (Alex Frost and Ed Galvin). There are a big group of people behind this mare and she had a torrid summer with two really bad bouts of colic.

“I think her owners would want to say thank you very much to Emily Matten, who looks after her when she goes back to Ladywood Stud and my travelling head girl Amy who rides her at home every day – when she complains she can’t hold her I know she’s in good form. I can claim no credit for this win at all!

“It means a lot for her to win again because at one stage during the summer we were wondering if she would even come back into training as she had such a torrid time. For her owners, I am absolutely chuffed to bits.

“Obviously black type for mares is important, and she is almost like a family pet to the Frosts and Galvins – they adore her. Just to see her get another day in the sun is really, really special.

“Emily and Alex’s team at Ladywood did such a fantastic job and she came back to me in really good condition. We said if the engine wasn’t still there, we wouldn’t continue. She has not become the easiest to train, but I knew having that run a couple of weeks ago it would have improved her. She didn’t love the ground today but travelled beautifully and jumped great.

“It was hugely satisfying.”

For Queens Gamble and her devoted team, the result felt particularly fitting on a day that celebrates loyalty and partnership – proof that patience and perseverance can still be rewarded on the racecourse.

Young chefs impress at Rotary Youth competitions

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Rotary’s 2026 Youth Competitions launched in style with the Young Chef event, supported by the Rotary Clubs of Shaftesbury, Sturminster Newton, Gillingham and Blandford.


Held at Sturminster Newton High School on 22nd January, eight students from Shaftesbury and Sturminster Newton competed to create a healthy two-course meal on a budget. Judgeswere Liz Bailey (Beautiful Buffets) and Cllr Barry von Clemens, both highly experienced chefs.
Sturminster Newton High School was represented by Phoebe Chick, Amber Barlow, Hannah Kilvington and Benjamin Thompson. From Shaftesbury High School came Harvey Woods, Kara Rudd, Matthew Cawley and Isaac Stone.
Two winners were selected: Benjamin Thompson (Sturminster) wowed with chicken curry and homemade ice cream, while Isaac Stone (Shaftesbury) impressed with garlic butter steak and apple crumble, describing his pudding as ‘evoking the cosy ambience of home’.
The judges commended all entrants for their skills – with Barry joking that one contestant’s pastry was better than his grandmother’s. Winners received certificates from Rotarian David Wynn Mackenzie and will progress to the Wessex District Final.
Thanks were given to the schools and judges for their support.
shaftesburyrotaryclub.org

The BV community news section is sponsored by Wessex Internet

Are we talking to a brick wall?

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Every parish has one (I think we have at least six) – older gentlemen of the village, full of profound local knowledge who are the eyes and ears of the parish. There are experts on ditches, hedges, farming, deer … all manner of rural life. Some will happily escort me to troublesome places, pointing out the defects.
Each time I bump into them, I come away knowing much more about traditional methods of doing things, yet I still don’t know enough. In parish council work you learn something new every day.
However … even with the assistance of these wonderful residents, there are times when I really need the help of Dorset Council. It could be a tricky highway issue or a question about planning. I might need to speak to a qualified engineer about a problem with gullies.
I was intrigued, then, to see a recent local report about the savings Dorset Council is making simply by not replacing staff when they leave. Apparently, they expect to save £1.3 million over the current and next financial years this way, with up to 30 vacancies left unfilled.
We’re all aware just how tight the council’s budget is … but in the back of my mind was another question. If all these people are leaving, who exactly is doing their work?
Knowing what the same action would mean in my day job, I can just imagine some council employees having to contend with inheriting someone else’s portfolio, or at least parts of it.

Is it me?
Then I put two and two together and a few things started to add up.
For weeks I have been trying to arrange a site meeting to deal with a challenging rights-of-way and planning issue. Emails have disappeared into cyberspace and there has been no response whatsoever. Meanwhile, residents are inconvenienced and annoyed at the lack of progress. I have to go in disguise to the village shop to avoid being questioned – again.
The lack of response was what bothered me. I had begun to wonder whether it was just me, and the council had a vendetta against the village. I re-read my emails, and there was nothing abrasive about them. It just seemed as though ‘no one was in’.
And before you say it, this has nothing to do with Storm Chandra: it has been going on for months. Was it just me?
I decided to do a little market research and phoned a couple of fellow parish councillors from across the county.
One promptly said they were trying to get a town council vacancy advertised. He was tearing his hair out – all the correct forms had been submitted in a timely manner, but no one responded, the post wasn’t advertised and of course people were asking what’s happening. Finally, giving it one more go, he managed to speak to a human. The person who managed this aspect of council work had left – and, crucially, no one had set up any email forwarding, nor had the inbox been delegated to someone else.
Another friend was asking for some planning advice, having faced down some bullish developers who were trying to ride roughshod over a pending development. Help and advice was very much needed.
Instead, there was no response to her query – now she’s considering standing down as a councillor as she feels so ineffective.
We should not have to put up with that.

I expect a reply
I noticed this week that if Simon Hoare rings the council they jump to attention – as happened at Winterborne Kingston when the residents were desperately trying to get some help. To be fair, it was an urgent problem and it needed sorting fast.
But perhaps I should start mimicking Simon Hoare when I ring the council?
Or should I stage a sit in at County Hall until I get a response?
Of course I do not expect the council officers to spend all day checking emails and responding immediately. Nothing else would get done.
I know it’s also easy for an email to get buried. However … I do expect a response from a department when I have to raise an issue. I have to go back to my parishioners and explain why nothing is happening.
Why is there a system where the local MP gets a response but parish councillors are ignored? I don’t contact the council for fun or to be a nuisance. I – and every parish councillor I know – only contact them when there is a serious issue that needs an answer.
I know how the council portal works: if I’m asking, it’s because it’s a complex issue that cannot be answered through the automated service. And if I can’t get through to someone to sort out my issues, how does a vulnerable person manage to get help?
All that said, I am also rather concerned for the welfare of some of the council officers – those having to take on the additional work in order for the Cabinet to be able to crow about savings.
And ‘saving’ what exactly? Corporate memory and expertise are valuable assets. When they are not replaced, gaps begin to show. As an elected parish councillor representing a community, I’d really like to see Dorset Council being more helpful and responsive, instead of hiding behind a metaphorical brick wall. Especially to those representing their local communities.

The Dorset Insider is a no-holds-barred column pulling back the curtain on local affairs with sharp insight, unfiltered honesty and the occasional raised eyebrow. Written by a seasoned parish councillor who prefers to remain anonymous (for obvious reasons), it cuts through the noise to expose the frustrations of grassroots politics, and say what others won’t.
Rest assured, their identity is known – and trusted – by the editorial team. Expect opinion, candour and a healthy dose of exasperation …*